did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
