bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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