try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Randomize
