I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
