i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
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