I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
what day is it and did you see me today?
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize