Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
