Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize