You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
Randomize
