My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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