I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
The feeling are messing with the penis
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
Randomize