I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
I stole a fireplace last night.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
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