I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
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