I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
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