I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
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