Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
i think i just lost a toe
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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