I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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