Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
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