Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
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