Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Randomize
