What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Its about making memories worth repressing
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
