i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
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Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
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Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
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