The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Randomize
