His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
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MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
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There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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