GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
