Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
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