I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Randomize
