My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize
