dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
