The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
