i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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