Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
This toilet bowl is my home.
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