She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
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