4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is