Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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