i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Your penis caused this!
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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