TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize
