we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Randomize
