you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
