If i come over, it means nothing
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Randomize
