i just google imaged poop.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
