what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Randomize
