I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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