im drinking this country out of the recession.
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
