He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
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