Having a random hookup so left but love u
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Randomize
