That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
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What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
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We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.