You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Randomize
