i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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