super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
