FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
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